Friday, May 13, 2011

New parent terminology

I have thought of some new terminology lately, related to my current state...

1. mombie - sleep-deprived mother of newborn; temporary condition that supposedly improves over time

2. disdressed - the situation a nursing mother finds herself in upon realizing that she cannot wear dresses for several months

3. second breakfast - a meal which hobbits, and newborns, are quite fond of

4. ambidextrimess - what happens when an individual is holding a baby in one arm and proceeding to feed her/his self with his/her non-dominant hand

5. gullaby - the naivete of a parent in thinking that a newborn is really asleep

6. stealth load - the surprising phenomenon that a baby has yet again filled his/her diaper in the 30 seconds since his/her last diaper change

7 comments:

ldsjaneite said...

hahaha!

the Holyoaks said...

Hilarious! My favorite is #6. My kids were both pros at that one. If I have another I will definitely be using that term.

Camille said...

So funny and so true. I laughed at all of these. Thanks.

Susan said...

So very true... especially the mombie.

Megan said...

Clever!

Marti Putnam said...

I think I'm just getting out of the mombie stage now that my baby is 1. Snuggling a newborn is so fun! Isn't it nice to have older children that are more than happy to help?

Dustin said...

very funny! you're clever! I definitely can relate to ALL!